Graveyard playlist 3RRR 102.7fm

Despite the exhaustion that set in due to an accumulated lack of sleep
this was alotta lotta fun.

Go here for the playlist if you dig.

Thanks

A simple purchase turned sour

Use ye olde English speaking voice whilst reading this number (lots of dignified pauses and shit):

Today whilst making a rather straightforward purchase
from a modern day auto-barn type of retailer I happen-stanced
upon an ogre of a man. A wobbling bowl of putty one might describe it as.

He manned the counter no less.

I was making an enquiry in regards to a nut found wanting
on the right rear tyre of my princely Subaru....He was in the
midst of assisting with my request when a woman of substantial looks
did pull up beside me at the counter and engage another shop
assistant with indeed her own purchase.

I took little notice, as I was preoccupied with my own agenda
as I like to think all other's are and should be! I digress.

The woman in question promptly made her purchase, turned and exited the
shoppery. Whence upon I looked at my ogre as he leered at me and spake the words....

I'd give her one.

Indeed not so much spake, but rather grunted as if a possum would upon defecating....
A sound fit for no one I assure you unless you are a possum of course.

Indeed Im sure you would my fat friend. Im sure you would.

However the questions begs to be asked does it not Chunkworthy, would she, this lady minding her own affairs, attractive in her own right and with her whole life before her even get so close to you as to smell your festering sores? Let alone....let you Jabba, give her as you so tenderly put it...... one?

We thinkest not my wobbling bowl of jelly. We thinkest not.

So with your recent remark still ringing in my ears why dont you scoot home, get that stinking pippy of yours
out of its old jockey and stick it in what you Australian's love to call a 4 'n' 20 ey?

Mind you only spin it for 2 minutes this time. Three minutes always scolds doesnt it Titties?

There's a lad.
Run along now Jabba

Hello Silence. Tell me how you're doin...

Silence speaks up for the first time this year.

I don't care when or where this is, I'm going to find it. You guys in?

Your mother's run away to France

Not one for recreating lyrics as it so often
spoils the magic, and if James Reyne had done so on his '88 single
my mum would never have belted out ' Your mother's run away to France'

However.... this number is worth
every word, nay, every letter being cast in gold.

Look at me, I'm a train on a track
I'm a train, I'm a train, I'm a chucka train, yeah
Look at me, got a load on my back
I'm a train, I'm a train, I'm a chucka train, yeah

Look at me, I'm going somewhere
I'm a train, I'm a train, I'm a chucka train, yeah
Look at me, I'm going somewhere
I'm a train, I'm a train, I'm a chucka train, yeah

Been a hard day, yes, it has been a hard day
Yes, it has been a hard day, yes, it has
I'm a train, I'm a chucka train, I'm a chucka train
I'm a train, I'm a chucka train, chucka train, yeah

Look at me, I'm a train on a line
I'm a train, I'm a train, I'm a chucka train, yeah
Look at me for the very last time
I'm a train, I'm a train, I'm a chucka train, yeah

It's been a life that's long and hard
I'm a train, I'm a train, I'm a chucka train, yeah
I'm going down to the breaker's yard
I'm a train, I'm a train, I'm a chucka train, yeah

Been a hard day, yes, it has been a hard day
Yes, it has been a hard day, yes, it has
I'm a train, I'm a chucka train, I'm a chucka train
I'm a train, I'm a chucka train, chucka train, yeah

It's been a life that's long and hard
I'm a train, I'm a train, I'm a chucka train, yeah
Going down to the breaker's yard
I'm a train, I'm a train, I'm a chucka train, yeah

Been a hard day, yes, it has been a hard day
Yes, it has been a hard day, yes, it has
I'm a train, I'm a chucka train, I'm a chucka train
I'm a train, I'm a chucka train, I'm a chucka train
I'm a train, I'm a chucka train, I'm a chucka train
I'm a train, I'm a chucka train

I'm a train
I'm a train
I'm a, I'm a, I'm a train
I'm a train
I'm a train.

The school year begins

You wouldn’t believe it….
Nicoles in a different class.
There’s no sign of Swamp Rat
And I’ve been split up from me mates.
Michaels raving about his damn trip to Disneyland and all I have to compare are the slush puppies at Seaspray
And… I’ve ended up with Mrs Dykestra…
This could be a long year if I don’t do something about it…

Take me back home- an email exchange

Morning boss.

What's the name and whereabouts of your kids childcare mate?
Gott get mine in for a day here and there.

Sniffle

Oh morning mate

Gee, first day back… Depressing mate. Even the sun don’t help…

OK, so my kids care is Chimneys – it’s a part of the Uni just up over Bright St on Nicholson St. Mate I don’t know how it fairs in the big scheme of things but it seems ok. We did a lot of investigating and checked out a bunch of joints and found it was the best one we saw… Me kid accepts it but doesn’t really like it – I don’t know if that’s a sign or if kids don’t like child care in general…? Sometimes I wonder if she could tell me how she feels she’d just say ‘the place sucks dad’. But you know what it’s like mate when you’re a kid… You end up in the strangest places and there’s nothing you can do about it hey…


Perfect. Thanks bossie.

Not just as a kid...as an adult too mate.
Life is one long time of being stuck in places
you dont want to be in and cant get out of.

Basically whenever we see our mums
we are saying ...get me out of here.

Sweet


Exactly.

Boss I’ve been thinking about the whole concept this morning heading to work… Strangest morning I’ve had in years… Dropping me kid off where she doesn’t want to be and then heading to a place I don’t want to be… The wind, the sun made it all crazy. A typical first day back at school. So lonely mate.

I was with me mum on the weekend checking out beds for me little kid… I nearly turned around to her and said forget the bed for the kid ma – I want one – take me back home.

Better

Listen Weather Im ahhhh...really sorry bout how I lost it yesterday.
I was just so tired and couldnt see the light at the end of the you know what.

I feel bad. Especially as I can see you're trying.
It's just that I have these strong feelings that overwhelm me
and they flip on themselves so quickly before I realise Ive lost it. You know?

Know what I mean?

Kinda like when you are all hot and summery
and shit and then maybe bam! you've started a shrubbery fire that's got way out of hand
and then you think, shit, sorry, here Ill sprinkle a little rain before that shrubbery is no more...

That's kinda what happened. I cant promise I wont do it again, but I will keep in mind that
we're all human (except you) and we are just trying to get by yeh?

Sorry mate. Feel bad.

Thanks for today anyway. Have a nice day.
(maybe drop the hot northerly if poss by the time I gotta ride home)

Us xxx